Message on "Craigs List"


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> Subject: Craig's list posting> Date: Tue, 27 Jan 2009 15:39:06 -0500> A craigslist posting someone found and linked. > > > > To the Guy Who Mugged Me Downtown (Downtown, Savannah ) I was the guy with the black Burrberry jacket that you demanded I hand over shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I hope you somehow come across this message. I'd like to apologize. I didn't expect you to crap your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. Truth is, I was wearing the jacket for a reason that evening, and it wasn't that cold outside. You see, my girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber 1911 .45 ACP pistol for Christmas, and we had just picked up a shoulder holster for it that evening. Beautiful pistol, eh? It's a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head, isn't it? I know it probably wasn't a great deal of fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge flopping about in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse since you also ended up leaving your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. I couldn't have you calling up any of your buddies to come help you try to mug us again. I took the liberty of calling your mother, or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, and explaining to her your situation. I also bought myself some gas on your card. I gave your shoes to one of the homeless guys over by Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all of the cash in your wallet, then I threw the wallet itself in a dumpster. I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell. They'll be on your bill in case you'd like to know which ones. Alltel recently shut down the line, and I've only had the phone for a little over a day now, so I don't know what's going on with that. I hope they haven't permanently cut off your service. I was about to make some threatening phone calls to the DA's office with it. Oh well. So, about your pants. I know that I was a little rough on you when you did this whole attempted mugging thing, so I'd like to make it up to you. I'm sure you've already washed your pants, so I'd like to help you out. I'd like to reimburse you for the detergent you used on the pants. What brand did you use, and was it liquid or powder? I'd also like to apologize for not killing you and instead making you walk back home humiliated. I'm hoping that you'll reconsider your choice of path in life. Next time you might not be so lucky. If you read this message, email me and we'll do lunch and laundry.
- Alex

I don't know if this actually happened or not but I laughed my rear off.....

I too laughed when I read it. I sincerely hope that it is for real! These "sh** for brains" thugs running around trying to have a free lunch need to be taught lessons!
I hope it was sarcasm because if the initial victim did indeed use a credit or debit card illegally from the subject's wallet that was left behind that's a crime.

Now the cell phone and shoes are a simple case of missing property. It's his problem if he didn't report the cell phone lost to his cell phone carrier. :rolleyes:
I like it, especially the happy ending...
Humm I wonder if the guy that tried to rob me in Orlando messed himself when I went for the HK????
What's so funny about this? That poor guy is probably traumatized, and may never be able to work in his chosen career again.
The sad part is that in the current legal system, he could probably sue and win on those grounds. He might even be able to collect lost wages.
There is a war brewing on the streets of America. A decidedly one way war in which criminals are committing violent crimes against the "people" of the United States. These criminals need to be destroyed by any meens possible.

I have news for you, a violent offender is back on the streets sooner than a person caught with CDS is.

Prison isnt bad for these people, they get cable tv, 3 meals a day, dont have to work, money every month for "gang pay." every medical bill paid in full, get to hang out and play basketball all day, and enjoy the fact that they have more rights than their victims do.

There is even "status" for these offenders for committing "serious" crimes against society.

So yeah, I wish the dude that got robbed had shot that tango like the enemy combatant he is.

Or maybe it is 0430 in the morning and I have just gotten off work at a maximum security prison.

Rant over
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