EastOkHotRod
Member
Many of you will remember me from having related my past experiences of defeating Lybian Terrorists and MS-13 in my home town. In those days I was woefully unarmed...carrying a mere four pistols on my attractive body. Since I am a 5'10" and a sexy 365 pounds, I'm able to easily conceal real pistols like the Ruger Super Redhawk, instead of impotent mouse guns like the 1911.
But in these dangerous times it is not enough. The police are woefully under-armed...carrying perhaps a pistol with three mags and an AR-15 in their squad cars. It is up to those of us who hold the Gold CCW Badge to patrol the streets of our towns, assuring order and morality.
Happily, I have found a way to bring as much firepower as I need to this daily battle.... The answer... a hot dog cart.
Yes...what looks less suspicious than a man pushing a Hot Dog Cart through the streets of his town on a nice spring day. I do it everyday in my hometown in Okalahoma. From morning 'til night. But, if attacked by MS-13, I have more than a hot weiner to defend myself.
Inside a typical New York hot dog cart, there is plenty of room for armament. Beneath the warming sinks are two S&W .500's, ready for quick deployment. Open the dors and, hanging on pegs, are a dozen lesser pistols such as Desert Eagles, Colt Pythons, Various Glocks, and the ubiquitous 1911's. Adjacent shelves hold loaded mags and speedloaders for them all.
In the lowest storage compartment there is ample space for long guns. I keep a pair of AR's, three Kalashnikovs, and a .45-70 lever action. There is also a sniper rifle, but it is kept broken-down due to space restrictions.
And there is still room for ammo...I carry approximately 6-thousand rounds on my daily patrols.
But the best part about my rig is the staying power it provides me in a gun fight. Even with thousands of rounds, the enemy can surround and starve you out. HAHAHA. Not Me!
Take for example a recent six day fight i had with MS-13. There were approximately 300 of them...THEY MEANT BUSINESS.
THERE I WAS...WITH MY BACK TO THE BRICK WALL OF THE MUNICIPAL RECREATION CENTER when the attack came. Three hundred angry mexican cartel thugs began riddling my hot dog cart with a withering fire from their Century Arms pistols and Double barrel shotguns. LUCKILY I HAD THE FORESIGHT TO INSTALL A SIX INCH IRON PLATE ON THE FRONT SIDE OF MY CART. So I just ducked down and laughed as the projectiles bounced impotently off my rolling fortress of hot weiners.
After the initial volleys, I returned fire, engaging them at long-range with my AR-15'S.... They attempted a massed frontal assault...three hundred of them in their sombreros shouting ARRIBA ARRIBA.... hahaha....I thinned their ranks with my AK-47's.
We than settled down into a siege situation. No problem for me. For the next six days I enjoyed my freshly cooked hot dogs and crunchy chips. Occasionally the MS-13 soldiers would even hoist a flag of truce and come buy hot dogs from me. They complained that I charged to much....but i said, "Just be glad I'm not charging for the lead I've been giving you." We all had a good laugh at that before resuming our battle.
After about three days it was getting a bit monotonous. Luckily, I had brought along my reloading equipment. I mounted it to the cart and managed to crank out a few hundred new rounds during my down-time.
They finally left on a Sunday morning. I guess even MS-13 has to be in church on the Sabbath.
As for me...tired, dirty, and with higher cholesterol...I pushed by cart home....VICTORIOUS.
I would advise anyone who wishes to consider themselves more than a novice or dilletante of concealed carry to invest in a hot dog cart.
THIS WILL BE A SAFER NATION WHEN, IN EVERY SMALL TOWN AND LARGE CITY, THERE ARE THOUSANDS LIKE ME PUSHING OUR CARTS THROUGH THE STREETS...DEFENDING CIVILIZATION AND MORALITY.
But in these dangerous times it is not enough. The police are woefully under-armed...carrying perhaps a pistol with three mags and an AR-15 in their squad cars. It is up to those of us who hold the Gold CCW Badge to patrol the streets of our towns, assuring order and morality.
Happily, I have found a way to bring as much firepower as I need to this daily battle.... The answer... a hot dog cart.
Yes...what looks less suspicious than a man pushing a Hot Dog Cart through the streets of his town on a nice spring day. I do it everyday in my hometown in Okalahoma. From morning 'til night. But, if attacked by MS-13, I have more than a hot weiner to defend myself.
Inside a typical New York hot dog cart, there is plenty of room for armament. Beneath the warming sinks are two S&W .500's, ready for quick deployment. Open the dors and, hanging on pegs, are a dozen lesser pistols such as Desert Eagles, Colt Pythons, Various Glocks, and the ubiquitous 1911's. Adjacent shelves hold loaded mags and speedloaders for them all.
In the lowest storage compartment there is ample space for long guns. I keep a pair of AR's, three Kalashnikovs, and a .45-70 lever action. There is also a sniper rifle, but it is kept broken-down due to space restrictions.
And there is still room for ammo...I carry approximately 6-thousand rounds on my daily patrols.
But the best part about my rig is the staying power it provides me in a gun fight. Even with thousands of rounds, the enemy can surround and starve you out. HAHAHA. Not Me!
Take for example a recent six day fight i had with MS-13. There were approximately 300 of them...THEY MEANT BUSINESS.
THERE I WAS...WITH MY BACK TO THE BRICK WALL OF THE MUNICIPAL RECREATION CENTER when the attack came. Three hundred angry mexican cartel thugs began riddling my hot dog cart with a withering fire from their Century Arms pistols and Double barrel shotguns. LUCKILY I HAD THE FORESIGHT TO INSTALL A SIX INCH IRON PLATE ON THE FRONT SIDE OF MY CART. So I just ducked down and laughed as the projectiles bounced impotently off my rolling fortress of hot weiners.
After the initial volleys, I returned fire, engaging them at long-range with my AR-15'S.... They attempted a massed frontal assault...three hundred of them in their sombreros shouting ARRIBA ARRIBA.... hahaha....I thinned their ranks with my AK-47's.
We than settled down into a siege situation. No problem for me. For the next six days I enjoyed my freshly cooked hot dogs and crunchy chips. Occasionally the MS-13 soldiers would even hoist a flag of truce and come buy hot dogs from me. They complained that I charged to much....but i said, "Just be glad I'm not charging for the lead I've been giving you." We all had a good laugh at that before resuming our battle.
After about three days it was getting a bit monotonous. Luckily, I had brought along my reloading equipment. I mounted it to the cart and managed to crank out a few hundred new rounds during my down-time.
They finally left on a Sunday morning. I guess even MS-13 has to be in church on the Sabbath.
As for me...tired, dirty, and with higher cholesterol...I pushed by cart home....VICTORIOUS.
I would advise anyone who wishes to consider themselves more than a novice or dilletante of concealed carry to invest in a hot dog cart.
THIS WILL BE A SAFER NATION WHEN, IN EVERY SMALL TOWN AND LARGE CITY, THERE ARE THOUSANDS LIKE ME PUSHING OUR CARTS THROUGH THE STREETS...DEFENDING CIVILIZATION AND MORALITY.
