Semper Fi Loffmar77 from the proud father of a Marine!
You have your emotional hands full I think. The good news is that you recognize and are willing to accept your duty as a husband and father to protect yourself and your family. As a former Marine / hunter, you're gun savvy which lends itself to concealed carry, so get on with it. But first you need to have a frank conversation with your wife. If you have a gun in your house, you must not, repeat not allow her to avoid learning gun safety and shooting. If she is not all in, she is a liability. You would never take a boating safety course and then boat with your wife who has not taken the same course right? I don't have facts but I would bet that most boaters take the family course so everyone on board is competent to handle the boat in any situation, but never do the same with the guns, which makes zero sense to me. I have this conversation all the time with guys I know. They have a gun but their wife hates guns. She's their wife, they share everything except the knowledge and proficiency to handle a weapon. One day she may have no choice and it will be too late.
She must be 100% in on all things guns in your home. If you plan only to carry, she must know when you do and when you don't, when you are and when you are not. She must know the laws and how to handle the weapon in the event you are incapacitated in a motor vehicle accident or for any other reason. If you are taken to a hospital and your vehicle is going to be towed, what happens to your side arm? She will have to take control of it and if she does not know how, you are putting her life and the safety of others at risk, period. My lady is a former cop...we get along great in the gun department!
As for your son, you know him best but to me 5 is a bit too young. Get your weapons locked up! I recommend a biometric fingerprint safe. There are several great models that can be mounted in drawers, on a desk or to the floor and can be programmed for up to 10 fingerprints. You can get to your piece at night if need be and you can mow the law while your son is watching TV without fear. $200.00 well spent!
In a few years, buy him a .22 rifle and start plinking together. Keep him away from hand guns until you are absolutely confident he will never touch a weapon without you or your wife present. Kids like to show off and often show their daddy's guns to their friends. Even if they are competent to handle them safely, accidents happen and they are advertising your valuables to others that might choose to steal them.
That's where I stand. Hope it helps...Semper Fi again!