Wife doesnt like me carrying

Sniperdad

Sniperdad

New member
I know this has probably been discussed before but I am always open for advise and learning something new. My wife absolutely does not like me conceal carrying. She feels its unnecessary and we have gotten by this long in life so why need it now. I tried to explain to her that I hope to never have to pull my gun in self defense but it only takes that 1 moment when you wish you had it and it could happen anywhere at anytime. I even tried to get her to go to the range with me and shoot a couple times, and that she may even enjoy it. However she has no interest. So that being said I don't even tell her when I am carrying or not. Any thoughts on how I could get her to change her way of thinking? This group is a wealth of information so someone out there must of had to deal with this at one point or so. Lets discuss amongst ourselves!
 
You are in a tough spot. The hardest part will be trying to be on the 'down low' when transitioning from CC to night time, and visa-versa... Do I have any ideas? None that haven't already been tossed around here for other guys in the same boat. Good luck to you sir and I hope she can be made aware of the good reasons to be armed and the even better reasons likely to come.
 
Luckily for me, my wife doesn't mind a bit. In fact the other night while at a major mall here in town, there were a lot of shady people walking around and I said wow, this is the first time I wished I'd have brought a bigger gun (generally carry a LCP). And She says "Yeah no kidding...."

So she doesn't mind...she even asked if I was going to carry at our son's baptism at church, to which I replied why would that bother you? Nope...just wondering, bad things happen at churches too...I didn't because even pocket carry was tough.

How did I get her to this state of mind, I subtly brought up crazy local, regional, and national events involving violence or crimes that involved people's children being harmed. How there just seem to be more and more crazy people out there these days. Pretty soon, I said, I think I'm going to get a carry permit. Okay was the only answer I got....

Believe it or not, someday you will be somewhere and she will ask if you have it along and feel relieved that you do. This has happened more than once for us and we don't go anywhere that is shady. I think I've almost got mine convinced to start shooting and get her own carry permit.

The other thing to keep in mind, WI is pretty new to CC, soon it will be more common.

Good luck my friend and since you are my neighbor to the east CONGRATS ON GETTING CARRY RIGHTS!!!!!
 
Just like kdc1974 said just slowy give reasons to carry. It may takes years but hopefully not. My wife realized when house in our small town were broke into in mid day that it can happen. Best part is since it was daytime crimes and that is when i work she now carrys and for both of us our gun is like pants we always have it on.
 
My g/f didn't understand why I chose to carry, but generally speaking, didn't mind. Only time she'd get upset is when we couldn't go somewhere (bar) because I was carrying. We talked about it one night finally, and tried to explain why I choose to carry. I think I used all the reasons most folks use. But a couple that she really took well: "Why do you lock the doors when you go to bed at night? Is someone going to come in? Odds are no, but you need to take precautions. Also, why do you wear your seat belts when you're in the car? Are you planning on being in a wreck? I mean, you've been driving for years and haven't needed the belts yet. She still locks her doors, and wears her seat belt. And she knows I'm not carrying to be cool, but rather to be prepared for that "remote" possibility. It really doesn't bother her anymore.
 
http://mobile.gothamist.com/2010/09/23/confession_reveals_brutal_details_i.php

Read her this story from CT... It was probably the most horrific, brutal and tragic home invasion in the states history. Hopefully the link works, as I'm posting from my phone. If not google the "Petite murder CT". This is probably the best reason I can think of to carry Everywhere!
 
I have (had) the same problem initially. I just sat her down and told her the reason I was carrying was to keep her safe not only here at home, but whe we were out. I told her that as the man of house it's my job to ensure her and the kids are safe. Her main problem was that she is afraid that the gun is going to go off all on its own. I just had to prove to her that it's not goign to go off just sitting there and that no one is killed by a gun just sitting there. Someone has to pull the trigger, in other words, guns do not kill people, people kill people. Then I took her to the range (unwillingly at first) and told her to fire the gun. After a few rounds she was ok, while she does not want of her own, she nows go the range with me and fires my G26. I Must admit, at times better than I do.
 
Best to have it and not need it

How many victims of crime were of the mindset that "it wont happen to me?" Pretty much everyone. The Petite family in CT, those on the Fort Hood army base, those that went to have their hair done in a salon in Seal Beach CA, those that went to eat at IHOP in Carson City NV, and the kids in the Chardon OH school--none of them expected to be attacked on a "normal day."

Do you want to ever wish you had a firearm but didn't? Or would you rather have one and not need it?
 
Man, I'm getting sick of all these "My Wife/GF wont let me do this or do that. Just man up and do it anyway. My wife has NO problem with firearms or me CCW'ing. Not that it would matter to me if she did have a problem with it. She doesn't shoot nor does she have any desire to shoot. But she sure the hell doesn't tell me when, if , or where I can shoot or CCW. But then again, I don't tell her what hobby's she can have either............

BTW, we have been married for 23+ years and have raised 3 children that are all in College so my stubborn attitude has worked so far.
 
My gf hates when I carry no matter open carry or conceal carry she hates it her dad is a LEO so you think she would be cool with it but she says guns are loud so she hates them. But I tell her that all I want and would love from her is to let me do what I want with my gun and carry it and she agreed to that and everything is fine now.
 
It's taken a while for my wife to accept it. I alway carried regardless of what she said. Told her my reasons, as they were to keep the family safe. She has warmed up to guns now. in In fact when I get home from work, I will be buying her first gun. A Rossi matched pair, 22lr barrel and .410 barrel. She is excited about it and I am too.
 
On the right path

You are on the right path by carrying anyways, but being sincere about her feelings and not telling her when you do. She is your wife, so chances are she will find out soon, and be able to tell when you are carrying. Eventually, she will get used to it, and then maybe she will start to get interested. As the husband, keep choosing the best way to defend your wife. Hopefully she gets interested sooner than later, and hopefully its her choice an not a choice forced upon her.

I am not in the same boat as you as my wife carries as well...she is even starting to OC. Good times in this household.
 
I should add, the ONLY time she's had an issue, is one time when I got home from the range, OWB carry that day, she was uncomfortable with "open" carry in the house so I pulled my shirt over it...I don't know why that bothered her, but I was respectful of her feelings. I even asked her why that was an issue and she said, I don't know that was all I needed to cover it up. So while she is VERY understanding, there are limits and I RESPECT those limits.
 
Why do you have smoke detectors and fire extinguishers helps too. Also you can say it is to protect her and your family, I think this was mentioned above but can tug at a woman's prince charming nerve. Try to carry in a way that makes her comfortable until she comes around. Don't force the range issue, we all know woman hate to be told what they need. And don't hire a friend to scare her and you come in and save the day, she will find out, trust me!!!
 
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