What Women Really Want...

Tucker's Mom

New member
Ok guys and dolls..I only have a few moments so I will just copy and paste this quick and make my getaway...

King Arthur and the Witch:


Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer and, if after a year, he still had no answer, he would be put to death.

The question?...What do women really want? Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, and to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. But, since it was better than death, he accepted the monarch's proposition to have an answer by year's end.

He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everyone: the princess, the priests, the wise men and even the court jester. He spoke with everyone, but no one could give him a satisfactory answer.

Many people advised him to consult the old witch, for only she would have the answer.

But the price would be high, as the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.

The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no choice but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer the question, but he would have to agree to her price first.

The old witch wanted to marry Sir Lancelot, the most noble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur's closest friend!

Young Arthur was horrified. She was hunchbacked and hideous, had only one tooth, smelled like sewage, made obscene noises, etc. He had never encountered such a repugnant creature in all his life.

He refused to force his friend to marry her and endure such a terrible burden; but Lancelot, learning of the proposal, spoke with Arthur.

He said nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur's life and the preservation of the Round Table.

Hence, a wedding was proclaimed and the witch answered Arthur's question thus:

What a woman really wants, she answered....is to be in charge of her own life.

Everyone in the kingdom instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth and that Arthur's life would be spared.

And so it was, the neighboring monarch granted Arthur his freedom and Lancelot and the witch had a wonderful wedding.

The honeymoon hour approached and Lancelot, steeling himself for a horrific experience, entered the bedroom. But, what a sight awaited him. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen lay before him on the bed. The astounded Lancelot asked what had happened

The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her when she appeared as a witch, she would henceforth, be her horrible deformed self only half the time and the beautiful maiden the other half.

Which would he prefer? Beautiful during the day....or night?

Lancelot pondered the predicament. During the day, a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of his castle, an old witch? Or, would he prefer having a hideous witch during the day, but by night, a beautiful woman for him to enjoy wondrous intimate moments?

What would YOU do?

What Lancelot chose is below.

BUT....make YOUR choice before you scroll down below.

OKAY?
























Noble Lancelot said that he would allow HER to make the choice herself.

Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time because he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of her own life.

Now....what is the moral to this story?





The moral is.....
If you don't let a woman have her own way....
Things are going to get ugly!
 
I have learned after 35 years of marriage "Happy wife Happy life". Means more then just words. What do women really want? I still don't know but this seems to work for me. :pleasantry:
 
I have been married for 38 years because I learned very early in my marriage to never criticize her cooking or her clothes. I try to eat what she has worked hard to prepare and let her make the decision on what she wants to wear. That has not always been easy but it beats the alternative. She taught school for 37 years and together we raised 3 children. She worked as hard, probably harder, than I have so I have no right to force her to do my biding.
 
A man finds a lamp, rubs it and the genie comes out. The genie says "Ok, you have one wish. Hurry up". The man who found the lamp proclaimed that he wanted peace in the Middle East. The genie quickly replied that it was too difficult and to pick again. The man quickly responded "Ok, that's easy! I want to know what women really want and how they think".

Without a thought the genie looked at the man and replied "Alright, let me see that map again...."
 
A man finds a lamp, rubs it and the genie comes out. The genie says "Ok, you have one wish. Hurry up". The man who found the lamp proclaimed that he wanted peace in the Middle East. The genie quickly replied that it was too difficult and to pick again. The man quickly responded "Ok, that's easy! I want to know what women really want and how they think".

Without a thought the genie looked at the man and replied "Alright, let me see that map again...."
I've also heard this as a bridge from California to Hawaii.
 
Sorry Mom but I have to add:

The dog's on the back porch barking to be let in. The wife's on the front porch yelling because you locked the door and she wants in. Ya open both doors and what happens...............................The dog quits barking!
 
Sorry Mom but I have to add:

The dog's on the back porch barking to be let in. The wife's on the front porch yelling because you locked the door and she wants in. Ya open both doors and what happens...............................The dog quits barking!

Ha ha!

Another one similar to this is the question of how do you tell who love you more...your wife or your dog. To find the answer, lock them both up in the trunk of your car. Then you come back in an hour and see which one is happy to see you!
 
Ha ha!

Another one similar to this is the question of how do you tell who love you more...your wife or your dog. To find the answer, lock them both up in the trunk of your car. Then you come back in an hour and see which one is happy to see you!

Brilliant, just brilliant. Of course please keep in mind I'm on my third. (Not Dog)
 
Brilliant, just brilliant. Of course please keep in mind I'm on my third. (Not Dog)
You have too much money...you work very hard...only to what? Give half of it to whoever is your wife now, then worked hard again only to be suckered once again...in another divorce? Haven't you learn yet? :sarcastic: Get a Chinese woman. One of my friends did. She didn't know diddle about the English language apart from "I love you..." They have survived for a year now with a translator. :biggrin: Saw them at the Sun n Fun at Lakeland, Florida this weekend. She is still so sweet and so much in love with her shiny head husband.:confused: I wonder what she sees in him???
 

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