Twas The Night Before Christmas (Anti-Obama version)

gejoslin

Illegitimi non carborundu
A treat from us to you:
Twas The Night Before Christmas (Anti-Obama version)

Twas the night before Christmas, all thru the White House
Obama sat stirring , with J. Biden the mouse
Golf stockings were hung, by the chimmney with care
In hopes the Tea Party wouldn’t notice them there
The children were nestled all snug in King beds
While visions of Maui still danced in there heads
With Michelle in her pj’s, and I in my cap
We just counted money, and settled down for a nap
When out in the lawn,there arose such a clatter
We sprang from the bed to see what was the matter?
Then away to the window, I flew like a flash
I tore off my cap, then threw up the sash
The moon on the breast, on the white fallen snow
Gave my own droopy eyes a view of people below
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
A blue chevy van, with six persons I fear
With a slender ol’ driver, so lively and quick
I knew in a moment it was Clint from that flick
More rapid than Eagles, The Fox friends all came
Clint whistled and shouted; He called them by name


Now Riley, Now Meagan, Now Hannity, Now Malkin
GO Gretta GO Get, The Benghazi’s chief Vixen
To the top of the porch, to the back of the hall
Now Dash away, Dash away, Dash away all
As dry leaves before, this same truth will fly
With media cover-up, They’ll fly to the sky
In back of the house in a quickness they flew
The van full of men, and Clint Eastwood too
And then in a twinkling, I heard from the road
Fox newsmen were speaking of my crazy tax load
As I drew in my head and was turning around
There stood the “Donald”, not making a sound
Suited up for business, from head to his feet
He wasn’t the person I had cared to meet
A big bundle of records was flung on his back
I thought of a peddler, while he opened his pack
His eyes how they sneered, his face cold and stern
I knew he would leave me a lesson to learn
His droll little mouth was drawn down like a bow
He was mad his toupee had fallen in snow
The stump of his pipe, he held in his teeth
The smoke encircled Michelle like a wreath
Trump knew the secret I would never reveal
Not even the votes I would willingly steal
I yelled “Give Up Now On this mission for self”
Trump smirked, then laid the form on my shelf
With a wink of his eye, and a nod of his head
I thought “could it be; I have nothing to dread?”
He spoke not a word, went straight to his work
Then left my birth record, and turned with a jerk
Then pointing his finger up toward my head
Then said “You are Fired; we want Romney instead!”
He sprung to his Limo, leaving me and the mouse
With Michelle looking worried of finding a house
Then I heard him exclaim, as he rode in the night”
“Merry Christmas to aaaall, and to aaaall a Goodniiiiiiiight!!!”

By Josephine Veliz Pebria
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