The difference between the North and the South - clearly explained...at last


Babarock

New member
The difference between the North and the South - clearly explained...at last


The North has Bloomingdale's , the South has Dollar General.

The North has coffee houses, the South has Waffle Houses.

The North has dating services, the South has family reunions.

The North has switchblade knives, the South has .45's.

The North has double last names, the South has double first names.

The North has Indy car races, the South has stock car races.

North has Cream of Wheat, the South has grits.

The North has green salads, the South has collard greens.

The North has lobsters, the South has crawfish.

The North has the rust belt, the South has the Bible Belt.

FOR NORTHERNERS MOVING SOUTH�

If you run your car into a ditch, don't panic. Four men in a four-wheel drive pickup truck with a tow chain will be along shortly. Don't try to help them, just stay out of their way. This is what they live for.

Don't be surprised to find movie rentals and bait in the same store. Do NOT buy food at this store.

Remember, 'Y'all' is singular, 'all y'all' is plural, and 'all y'all's' is plural possessive

Get used to hearing 'You ain't from round here, are ya?'

Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed later on how to use it.

Don't be worried at not understanding what people are saying. They can't understand you either.

The first Southern statement to creep into a transplanted Northerner's vocabulary is the adjective 'big'ol,' truck or 'big'ol' boy. Most Northerners begin their Southern-influenced dialect this way. All of them are in denial about it.

The proper pronunciation you learned in school is no longer proper.

Be advised that 'He needed killin.' is a valid defense here.

If you hear a Southerner exclaim, 'Hey, y'all watch this,' you should stay out of the way.
These are likely to be the last words he'll ever say.

If there is the prediction of the slightest chance of even the smallest accumulation of snow, your presence is required at the local grocery store. It doesn't matter whether you need anything or not. You just have to go there and buy bread and milk.

Do not be surprised to find that 10-year olds own their own shotguns, they are proficient marksmen, and their mammas taught them how to aim.

In the South, we have found that the best way to grow a lush green lawn is to pour gravel on it and call it a driveway.

AND REMEMBER: If you do settle in the South and bear children, don't think we will accept them as Southerners. After all, if the cat had kittens in the oven, we ain't gonna call 'em biscuits.
 

Tucker's Mom

New member
Now...now...children...stop this right now or you're all going to sleep together in the same room tonight!!!!! :angry:Solve your little "who started it" in the backyard RIGHT NOW!!

hehehehe:biggrin:
 
It's funny, I'm from the West, so we stayed (mostly) out of your silly tiff. All of the stuff before the "Notherners moving South" part could be taken positive either way; except the one line to me comes across as a MAJOR dig at the South: "The North has dating services, the South has family reunions." That strikes me too much as saying that family reunions *ARE* dating services in the South.

The West seems to be a mix of the two. I'm an Oregon native, and my wife is from Nebraska, and we both exhibit various parts of both.
 

wooddoctor

New member
Not to mention that the North won the...never mind.

Let's not for get that the north had owed Many slaves for their interest as well. Your buddy Abe started shipping the slaves back to Africa but the treasury ran out of money. So....if they would have increased the debt limit back then just think how things would be different today. The south is mostly a right to work state....and you jackass can't figure this out. By the way... I was born and raisesd in Pa at least the south for now don't have to be invaded buy union low live thugs. if the Mac daddy get another four year to socialize the yes
 

CharlieK

New member
It's funny, I'm from the West, so we stayed (mostly) out of your silly tiff. All of the stuff before the "Notherners moving South" part could be taken positive either way; except the one line to me comes across as a MAJOR dig at the South: "The North has dating services, the South has family reunions." That strikes me too much as saying that family reunions *ARE* dating services in the South.

The West seems to be a mix of the two. I'm an Oregon native, and my wife is from Nebraska, and we both exhibit various parts of both.

You ain't from round here, are ya?
 

wooddoctor

New member
I am not sure what nation you live in, but in the United States of America, there is no state called, "the south".
Gulf you would be wise to pick your battles. Most states in the south are a right to work. More range time might cure this sort of thinking.
 

TheSp8

New member
I've told a few transplanted Yankees that "You know, I was a man grown before I knew damn Yankee was two words". Usually this was in response to derogatory remarks about my accent or their condescending remarks about how we did things in small town South.

YMOS,
Tony
 

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