I shoot what feeds the best (as in 100% of the time) and what gives the best accuracy if more than one round feeds reliably.
Every gun I have is a little different in that regard except for my Para Ordnance P13.45 and a 1991A1 Combat Commander. Both like the same CorBon 200gr +P+ load. The 625 S&W liked the 230gr Eldorado Starfire (a real nice load that was designed by the originator of the Hydrashock as a follow up and advancement of the basic design) and I have a Witness in .45 that likes the 230 Hydrashock.
As a rule of thumb, in .45ACP, I step down in bullet weight for every inch of barrel I lose. Full length, 5 inch+ guns shoot 230gr bullets, 4-4 1/4 inch guns get 200gr and 3 inch guns get 185gr loads.
I don't use a 165gr bullet in any .45 (and I own, shoot and reload 3 different .45 caliber chamberings.). If I want to shoot something that light, I'll tote a .40 and not have to worry about velocity issues. I feel the same way about heavy bullet 9mm loads. I can just use a .38 Super and not worry about velocity issues.
My reasoning for doing this is the simple fact that the shorter the barrel, the less velocity you will get and ALL jacketed hollow points need a certain minimal velocity (usually around 1000fps in most cases) to expand as designed. A 230gr bullet isn't going to be doing more than around 700fps from a 3 inch barrel. (Don't believe me? Check for yourself. All you need is a gun, some ammo and a chrongraph.) If your bullet of choice needs 900+fps to expand reliably, you're not going to get that expansion from it. Going to a +P or +P+ load is an option but in a 3 inch barrel, all you get- other than increased recoil- is a lot of unburned powder in the gun, a HUGE muzzle flash and about a 20fps velocity increase-if that much.
I haven't played around with testing the new 'short barrel' ammunition on the market but I hold high hopes for it. The folks that design commercial ammunition know that if it ain't as advertised (or at least pretty darn close), they are likely to lose a customer for ALL their brand's ammunition- not just that particular instance.