Rules for kicking ass

[Tucker's Mom]

Rules for Kickin' Ass for the Non-Military


Make sure you read #13


Dear Civilians:

We know that the current state of affairs in our great nation has many civilians up in arms and excited to join the military. For those of you who can't join, you can still lend a hand. Here are a few of the areas where we would like your assistance:

1. The next time you see any adults talking (or wearing a hat) during the playing of the National Anthem -- kick their ass.

2. When you witness, firsthand, someone burning the American Flag in protest -- kick their ass.

3. Regardless of the rank they held while they served, pay the highest amount of respect to all veterans. If you see anyone doing otherwise, quietly pull them aside and explain how these veterans fought for the very freedom they bask in every second. Enlighten them on the many sacrifices these veterans made to make this Nation great. Then hold them down while a disabled veteran kicks their ass.

4. If you were never in the military, DO NOT pretend that you were. Wearing battle dress uniforms (BDUs) or Jungle Fatigues, or telling Others that you used to be 'Special Forces.' Collecting GI Joe memorabilia might have been okay when you were seven years old, now it will only make you look stupid and get your ass kicked.

5. Next time you come across an *Air Force* member, do not ask them, "Do you fly a jet?" Not everyone in the Air Force is a pilot. Such ignorance deserves an ass-kicking (children are exempt).

6. If you witness someone calling the Coast Guard 'non-military,' inform them of their mistake -- and kick their ass.

7. Next time Old Glory (the US flag) marches by during a parade, get on your damn feet and pay homage to her by placing your hand over your heart. Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to be carrying her. Of course, failure to do either of those could earn you a severe ass-kicking..

9. "Your mama wears combat boots" never made sense to me -- stop saying it! If she did, she would most likely be a vet and therefore would kick your ass!

10. "Flyboy" (*Air Force*), "Jarhead" (*Marines*), "Grunt" (*Army*), "Squid" (*Navy*), "Puddle Jumpers" (*Coast Guard*), etc., are terms of endearment we use describing each other. Unless you are a service member or vet, you have not earned the right to use them. Using them could get your ass kicked.

11. Last, but not least, whether or not you become a member of the military, support our troops and their families. Every Thanksgiving and religious holiday that you enjoy with family and friends, please remember that there are literally thousands of soldiers, sailors, marines and airmen far from home wishing they could be with their families. Thank God for our military and the sacrifices they make every day. Without them, our Country would get it's ass kicked.

12. It's the Veteran, not the reporter, who has given us the freedom of the press.

It's the Veteran, not the poet, who has given us the freedom of speech.

It's the Veteran, not the community organizer, who gives us the freedom to demonstrate.


It's the Military who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and whose coffin is draped by the flag, who allows the protester to burn the flag.

AND ONE MORE:

13. If you ever see anyone singing the national anthem in Spanish -- KICK THEIR ASS.

ONE LAST THING:

If you got this email and didn't pass it on -- guess what? You deserve to get your ass kicked!

I sent this to you, not because I didn't want to get my ass kicked, BUT BECAUSE YOU ARE VERY, VERY SPECIAL TO ME, I KNOW YOU WILL NOT BE OFFENDED AND ARE PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN, AND WILL FORWARD THIS ALSO.

 

[the dark]

God forbid that someone who does not speak a language expresses their allegiance to the nation!

Sorry, but as a veteran I find that assinine.

 

[CharonPDX]

4. If you were never in the military, DO NOT pretend that you were. Wearing battle dress uniforms (BDUs) or Jungle Fatigues, or telling Others that you used to be 'Special Forces.' Collecting GI Joe memorabilia might have been okay when you were seven years old, now it will only make you look stupid and get your ass kicked.

HAH! If only more people payed attention to this one. (Just like the sports corollary: If you do not currently play on an organized sports team, do not wear a sports uniform, not even just the jersey.)

5. Next time you come across an *Air Force* member, do not ask them, "Do you fly a jet?" Not everyone in the Air Force is a pilot. Such ignorance deserves an ass-kicking (children are exempt).

Except all of my Air Force friends do! (And a couple Army friends, for that matter.)

9. "Your mama wears combat boots" never made sense to me -- stop saying it! If she did, she would most likely be a vet and therefore would kick your ass!

My grandmother *DID* wear combat boots. Apparently nobody ever used that insult against my dad - he had the perfect response ready "Yeah, she did. As a drill instructor in the Marine Corps during the War. What did yours do?"

13. If you ever see anyone singing the national anthem in Spanish -- KICK THEIR ASS.

I agree with the letter of the statement, "The Star Spangled Banner" is in English, it should be sung in the language it was written. I've never heard anyone even ATTEMPT to sing it in Spanish, so it seems pointless. And I most certainly disagree with the implication that those who do not speak English are somehow "less American". We are the melting pot. Until WW1, there were large parts of this country where German was not just common, but the SOLE language. My wife's family is from such a part of Nebraska. In some parts, city/county records are all in German up through about 1930! (And, heck, if we had gone to war solely with Italy and/or with France instead of Germany, odds are those parts would *STILL* be predominantly German-speaking...)

 

[eXGee11]

I never served (medically disqualified) but I wear ripstop green non camo bdu pants and a big badass desert camo bdu jacket. Its the most rugged, warm, and comfortable articles of clothing I own. I had one guy "thank me for my service". I told him I never served but would gladly pass it on. He didn't kick my ass.

 

[swsd40]

GO NAVY!! U.S.S. John F. Kennedy CV-67 , '80-'84.

 

[Cotillion]

I've always wanted to join the army but refused to shave my beard. I'd never be caught dead dressed like a soldier but I think my willingness ( minus the whole beard thing ) should keep me from getting my ass kicked on that make believe day my clothes got wet and I was forced to wear an army shirt or something

 

[Keykutter]

I've always wanted to join the army but refused to shave my beard. I'd never be caught dead dressed like a soldier but I think my willingness ( minus the whole beard thing ) should keep me from getting my ass kicked on that make believe day my clothes got wet and I was forced to wear an army shirt or something

You should get your ass kicked just for the stupid things you say here!.

Just kidding. I just thought I would beat someone else in saying it.

When I went to boot camp, the barber asked me if I wanted to keep my long sideburns. Hell yes says me. Then he told me to hold out my hand.

Elated and struck down in an instant.

KK

 

[Cotillion]

I've always wanted to join the army but refused to shave my beard. I'd never be caught dead dressed like a soldier but I think my willingness ( minus the whole beard thing ) should keep me from getting my ass kicked on that make believe day my clothes got wet and I was forced to wear an army shirt or something

You should get your ass kicked just for the stupid things you say here!.

Just kidding. I just thought I would beat someone else in saying it.

When I went to boot camp, the barber asked me if I wanted to keep my long sideburns. Hell yes says me. Then he told me to hold out my hand.

Elated and struck down in an instant.

KK

I was made this way KK by the members of this forum. I frequent other forums and I never say jerk things or argue so poo on you.

P.s even to this day ( 29 ) I'd love to join, but I look like a fat perv without my sexy man beard

 

[Tucker's Mom]

My grandmother *DID* wear combat boots. Apparently nobody ever used that insult against my dad - he had the perfect response ready "Yeah, she did. As a drill instructor in the Marine Corps during the War. What did yours do?"

I like that...it is a nice quick comeback.

I agree with the letter of the statement, "The Star Spangled Banner" is in English, it should be sung in the language it was written. I've never heard anyone even ATTEMPT to sing it in Spanish, so it seems pointless.

Never did I, but I just copied this here as I was sent it...Don't blame me. <g>

And I most certainly disagree with the implication that those who do not speak English are somehow "less American". We are the melting pot. Until WW1, there were large parts of this country where German was not just common, but the SOLE language. My wife's family is from such a part of Nebraska. In some parts, city/county records are all in German up through about 1930! (And, heck, if we had gone to war solely with Italy and/or with France instead of Germany, odds are those parts would *STILL* be predominantly German-speaking...)

I certainly agree with you and anyone on this one. But I am still on the thinking that immigrants should learn English as a second language and not impose their language in THIS English-speaking country. When we were in Europe, we met a German on our way to Paris and he spoke perfect English. He said it was a requirement for them to be able to speak English because it is the language of the world and that way they can be anywhere (but in Paris...mockingly spoken...)in the world and they can be understood.

My husband's parentage came direct from Germany and settled in Kansas. Throughout their farming careers, they have had German prisoners assigned to help them in their farm. It was the rule of their household to speak English, so hubby grew up speaking and understanding a spattering of German. I was the other way -- I grew up raised by Spanish born and raised/speaking 1st generation Spaniards. But because when we went to school our curriculum was modeled after the Americans, we were "ordered" to speak English from then on. I am still learning how to "speak" American English after many years of living here.

 

[tuts40]

I've always wanted to join the army but refused to shave my beard. I'd never be caught dead dressed like a soldier but I think my willingness ( minus the whole beard thing ) should keep me from getting my ass kicked on that make believe day my clothes got wet and I was forced to wear an army shirt or something

Here's the truth, as I see it, from that: "I was unwilling or afraid to join and I use my beard as the excuse". Are you THAT into your looks or are you afraid of joining?

 

[titaniumman]

I've always wanted to join the army but refused to shave my beard. I'd never be caught dead dressed like a soldier but I think my willingness ( minus the whole beard thing ) should keep me from getting my ass kicked on that make believe day my clothes got wet and I was forced to wear an army shirt or something

You really DO post some pretty Dumb things on here...Stupid is as stupid does. Sounds more like you lacked the jewels. And the hair covers the face of a coward. I took the entrance test and did very well, was denied entrance due to lung surgery that I didn't disclose. I failed to mention it because I knew I would be disqualified. My older bro. who joined at the same time, still serves now.

 

[Treo]

I seem to remember taking an oath at some point, something about protect and defend the Constitution of the United States. Which would include IMO the free speech rights of a person not to participate in the singing of the National Anthem, or to participate in their native language (Ever seen the Star Spangled Banner in ASL?) or to protest the governement by burning an American flag (regardless of how deplorable I personally, find such an action).

I am a vet and I never (w/ the exception of my poly pros and cold weather boots in the winter and my Desert boonie in the summer) wear uniform clothing. I don't want some random stranger "Thanking me for my service" Not that I'm not proud but if I don't know you I don't want you in my bubble.

 

[Treo]

You really DO post some pretty Dumb things on here...Stupid is as stupid does. Sounds more like you lacked the jewels. And the hair covers the face of a coward. I took the entrance test and did very well, was denied entrance due to lung surgery that I didn't disclose. I failed to mention it because I knew I would be disqualified. My older bro. who joined at the same time, still serves now.

So, ultimately neither one of you went and since we really don't know how either one of you would have done neither one of you really has a basis for commenting on the other's "stones"

 

[titaniumman]

So, ultimately neither one of you went and since we really don't know how either one of you would have done neither one of you really has a basis for commenting on the other's "stones"

At least I tried...It was his beard comment I found lame. I did everything in my power to enlist, including taking the test. That should count for something...No?

 

[Treo]

At least I tried...It was his beard comment I found lame. I did everything in my power to enlist, including taking the test. That should count for something...No?

Sure, why not ? I'll give you an "e" for effort.

Doesn't change the fact that you got just as close to the horseshit and gunsmoke as cotillion did

 

[titaniumman]

Sure, why not ? I'll give you an "e" for effort.

Doesn't change the fact that you got just as close to the horseshit and gunsmoke as cotillion did

I will agree to disagree..I don't think anything short of a purple heart will make you happy anyways!! Besides just because you were able to join with success doesn't mean that you are not a chicken ******, Maybe you just cried in your pillow. I think the word keyboard in your sig. says alot.

 

[Treo]

I will agree to disagree..I don't think anything short of a purple heart will make you happy anyways!! Besides just because you were able to join with success doesn't mean that you are not a chicken ******, Maybe you just cried in your pillow. I think the word keyboard in your sig. says alot.

Nope, I didn't cry (doesn't mean I wasn't scared) I did my time. My point is don't dog on him for not doing what you didn't do either.

He didn't want to go , he didn't

You wanted to go, guess what you still didn't

Same result

So lighten up francis

 

[titaniumman]

Lighten up francis....Thats my line!! just used it on navylt...funny just the same.

 

[Treo]

Ok well, I tried to say it three ways and it keeps coming out smart assed so Let me try again

Regardless of the circumstance neither you nor cotillion joined the military. So, neither one of you should be ragging on the other for not joining.

The fact that I did join doesn't make me a bad ass (except in comparison to the Navy) it just makes me a vet.


And while we're here the Coast Guard is part of the DHS similar to the Waffen S.S. what ever they may have been they are not (IMO)part of the military

 

[JimPage]

Children:

Please end this ricicuous argument!!!! Sheesh