Just when you thought you've heard it all.....

Thief Tells Tennessee Police Tale of Secret Mission

The Associated Press


It wasn't the preferred way to enter the Knoxville Museum of Art, but Richard Anthony Smith told police he was on a mission. The 25-year-old Knoxville man called 911 from his cell phone before dawn Wednesday saying he was trapped in an air conditioning duct leading from the museum roof, Knoxville police spokesman Darrell DeBusk said.

Police and firefighters reached the roof, found a rope and cable and followed them to a vent shaft. Peering inside, they spotted Smith about 45 feet down.

"Mission failed," he told them.

Hoisted up and read his rights, Smith told police he was a "special agent from the United States Illuminati, badge number 0931" and had rappelled onto the museum from a helicopter, a police report said.

He said he was following orders to "defuse and confiscate" a Soviet-made nuclear warhead, specifically a "MERV6SS-22AN" warhead, according to the report. The bomb supposedly was hidden in a blue, plastic cow sculpture in the museum basement, he said.

However, Smith told officers his "agency" called while he was in air-vent limbo to say it made a mistake and the bomb might be in a Memphis museum instead.

Police charged Smith with aggravated robbery. He was being held on $2,000 bond at the Knox County Jail. Authorities said he did not have a lawyer.

"Fortunately he was able to reach his cell phone," DeBusk said, "or he may not have been found for quite some time."

Very creative, still stupid. :ph34r:


Some imagination he has there. Sounds like he has been watching to many Mission Impossible movies.
I give the guy credit on he was trying to be create and talk his way out of it. Still very dumb though.

Nothing better than a stupid crook!
It's true.....I'm also a member of the U.S. Illuminati in Memphis. The cow is in a safe spot as we heard some jackhole was going to rappel into an air shaft in Knoxville.....it is safe now! :crazy_pilot:

anyone hear anything on this? I am just curious what the aftermath was. I could use another laugh from this subject lol

I heard he escaped from jail to be found several hours later. They found him in a field a few miles away with his hand up some cows butt in search for a Soviet nuke. The Cow is expected to make a full recovery.
same here. This story really gave me a good laugh. I was hoping for more haha

So was I. I'll be on the lookout for more in the next few days, just so I can laugh some more. After all, they say that laughter is the best exercise. :laugh:

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