For Veterans Day -- A Humorous Look Back

[localgirl]

Everyone's getting a little too anxious and stressed out about the election results, so I thought for this Veterans Day I would share with you a page I found from my grandfather's officers' training notebook from some 70 years ago. I think some of these will make you chuckle.

Taboos:

1. Carrying umbrellas
2. Pushing baby carriages
3. Keep right arm free
4. No excuses
5. Carrying packages
6. Leaning on desk
7. Introduce one's self
8. Never refer to CO as old man in his presence
9. Avoid profanity
10. Never give or receive presents
11. Never go over a superior officer's head
12. Never write bad checks
13. Do not assign NCO to fatigue
14. Do not read others' mail
15. Act as officer at all (times?) no discredit to uniform
16. Sanctity of official statements not to be violated
17. Not to associate with notorious prostitutes
18. Support of family

 

[Lowjiber]

I was a commissioned Army officer (artillery) in the mid-60's. I got a kick outta the list, especially #17. Evidently, it was okay to associate with prostitutes as long as they weren't "notorious". LOL

The "Old Man" thing was always funny to me anyway. Before going to Vietnam, I was the CO of an AIT company in Ft. Jackson. I was in my early 20's, and the DI's were mostly seasoned combat veterans who were at least fifteen years older. My First Sergeant always referred to me as the Old Man, whether I was in the room or not.

I learned a lot about the Army during that assignment.

 

[sdprof]

Some more old rules. I especially like #21


PILOT INSTRUCTIONS

1. Don't take the machine into the air unless you are satisfied it will fly.

2. Never leave the ground with the motor leaking.

3. Don't turn sharply when taxiing. Instead of turning sharp, have someone lift the tail around.

4. In taking off, look at the ground and the air.

5. Never get out of a machine with the motor running until the pilot relieving you can reach the engine controls.

6. Pilots should carry hankies in a handy position to wipe off goggles.

7. Riding on the steps, wings, or tail of a machine is prohibited.

8. In case the engine fails on takeoff, land straight ahead regardless of obstacles.

9. No machine must taxi faster than a man can walk.

10. Never run motor so that blast will blow on other machines.

11. Learn to gauge altitude, especially on landing.

12. If you see another machine near you, get out of the way.

13. No two cadets should ever ride together in the same machine.

14. Do not trust altitude instruments.

15. Before you begin a landing glide, see that no machines are under you.

16. Hedge-hopping will not be tolerated.

17. No spins on back or tail slides will be indulged in as they unnecessarily strain the machines.

18. If flying against the wind and you wish to fly with the wind, don't make a sharp turn near the ground. You may crash.

19. Motors have been known to stop during a long glide. If pilot wishes to use motor for landing, he should open throttle.

20. Don't attempt to force machine onto ground with more than flying speed. The result is bouncing and ricocheting.

21. Pilots will not wear spurs while flying.

22. Do not use aeronauticle gasoline in cars or motorcycles.

23. You must not take off or land closer than 50 feet to the hanger.

24. Never take a machine into the air until you are familiar with its controls and instruments.

25. If an emergency occurs while flying, land as soon as possible.

 

[localgirl]

I have now been sorely tempted to try #22.

 

[fstroupe]

I have now been sorely tempted to try #22.

That's what we used for racing fuel in the '70s, 160 octane aviation fuel. Cost about $2.00/gallon when gas at the pump was $0.55.

 

[Lowjiber]

I'll add my favorite: "Takeoff is optional. Landing is mandatory."

That, along with a picture of a wrecked helicopter, hung on the inside of my flight gear closet for twenty years.